Dear Douchebag sitting behind me at the game tonight:
I know this is a difficult concept for someone of your limited intelligence to understand, but in civilized parts of the world, when we dump a beer down someone’s back because we’re tryin’ to get us one of them there Chipotle t-shirts they’re throwing out, it is customary to at least, say, offer an apology.
Thanks for making my “game experience” even worse than the Jackets’ half-assed play alone could do.
All Wet in 209
P.S. People who don’t know jack shit about hockey really ought not to keep up a running commentary during the game.